Monday, June 29, 2009
I went and jumped on the C25k bandwagon.
Good Lord what was I thinking?! What kind of stupid person showers before attempting her first bit of exertion in a decade?!
I hate running. I've never been drawn to running. I think my knees hurt if I run too much. But I wouldn't know. Because I've never run with any regularity.
Workout #1 was ok until about 3/4 of the way through. It was quite the effort to get through the last 3 60-second runs.
And then...Buddy on the podcast says something about how you're not supposed to be feeling overly exerted or out of breath. What is he thinking?! And that comment in the last 60-second run? The one where he says '20 seconds...is up'. As in there's still 40 seconds to go. Who does that?! Why doesn't he wait until there's only 20 seconds remaining. I tell ya. Not impressed. I am so loading up a different podcast for workout #2.
But I finished. It was a disgustingly sweaty finish. Not attractive. A cool shower was required.
And at the very end of my workout, when I was walking to cool down, I had to tun the volume of my iPod way up to drown out the 'this was such a stupid idea' thoughts I was having. There were also the 'please don't let anyone see me jiggling' thoughts. Thank goodness I have a fairly extensive green space to hide in while exercising.
I know what I was thinking. I was thinking about the new bathing suit I just bought. ($5, Old Navy Summer Swim Sale or some such silliness.) I was thinking about how the only pants that are comfortable are my WalMart fat jeans. I was thinking that my 10th wedding anniversary is coming up. I was thinking that I used to be a role model for active living and fitness. I was thinking about how out of shape and lazy I have become. I was thinking about how I turn up injured after the least bit of physical activity.
I really hope I'm not sore tomorrow. My plan is to keep busy in order not to think about the whole ugly business of running on purpose to exercise. I'm really very pathetic.
But, wouldn't it be cool if I could stick with it? It's a nine week program and I have nine weeks of official summer break. It just fits so nicely in a perfectionist, obsessive kind of way. I wonder if that's considered 'motivation'?